My son will graduate next week.  This is a change in a world of change that is taking a part of my soul, elevating my hopes and exciting my nerves to previously unknown levels.  I want him to be happy,not today or this minute, but I want lasting happiness.  That happiness that I have found in the calling of his mother. I want that to last forever for him.  I want him to not know pain anymore.  Although I know this is an unrealistic want, it burns deep within me, filling my chest with such a longing that the pressure hurts. I  want to turn my eyes heavenward and ask, "When is it enough?  Please give him a break, lead him where you want him, but give him a break."

The life of his childhood has been filled with uncertainty and unrest.  We have bonded over the ease of an absent father, dreading his arrival from work and the inability to predict its outcome.  We have spent hours in the past three years, trying fruitlessly to keep evil at bay by ourselves.  We have experienced the real saving powers of the Holy Ghost as he snatched us from the evil grip of a forced, early death.  We are bound together through tribulation that should not have been his.

I hope for this time to be his, without the need to look over his shoulder.  I hope that he can relax and finally taste some of the normal worries that someone his age should have.  I hope for the burden to lift from his shoulders and that his lungs might fill with freedom.  I hope for the talents and dreams that pull at the seams of his being to burst forth and create the future that he was meant to live.  I hope for him to live the life that he was designed for, the life that was predestined to be his and that I have glimpsed a few times over the years as I looked in to the unique eyes that are his.

I have watched his character grow on a baseball diamond.  His big heart and determination have risen when backed against a wall.  He was shown class and his love of the game against adversity.  As his pitcher's arm waned and his catcher's arm developed, my admiration for this young man that shares my genes grew immensely.  He is adaptable, he is strong, and he is a fighter.

The next chapter in his life will have to been written alone.  I am sure he will do well because it is who he is.